Please and Thank you

How is it possible that 29 days of the month a woman can be as sane as a brick wall, and one day, a stark raving lunatic?
I swear today, I feel as if I was somehow misdiagnosed and instead of having hypo thyroid, I have hyper-hysteria.
Where is my Prozac? Shove the Advil and gimme the good stuff, Vicatin.

Today is my one sure-fire day to send the kids to Rita’s. To tell you the truth it is as much for their safety as it is for my rest.
But no, they are recovering. If you have ever had children you will know that “recovery” far out weighs the stress of kids actually being sick. In “recovery” they are physically better, their energy is up, way up, and the parents are forced to contend with every rule that has been broken for the last 7 days. Every extra hour, or two…whose kidding 5, that you let them watch TV, they are begging for an extra 5 more, pretty much in hopes that entire day can be spent with the television on, even if not watched. Every piece of broccoli that was swept off the plate or meal skipped is now a regular routine; instead of not eating, all they want is popcorn or cheese crackers. Talking back, hitting siblings and mis-behavior in general is accepted in their little minds, The New Rule. Lets just say they have been the center for so long, you spend the next seven days reprogramming them to the correct center. That being you and your FREAKING CRAMPS!

I love you kids.
Please don’t shove each other to see who can lay across-on top-sideways over mommy more then the other.
Please don’t throw your full cups of milk on each other at the table.
Please don’t later spit milk in each other’s faces and think it is really fun game. It is not a really fun game.
Please don’t steal the chocolate syrup out of the refrigerator, lock yourself in my bedroom and drink half then poor the other half all over mommy’s sheets and bed frame.
Please don’t completely fall apart screaming and kicking at Wal-Mart because I will not buy you cotton candy pink pumps. (That was Moses by the way)

I love you kids.
Thank you for loving me so much that you fight over me.
Thank you for fighting this Flu/Pneumonia and recovering at home and not the hospital.
Thank you for laughing when I fly you in the air like an airplane.
Thank you hugging me two minutes after I scream at you for stealing the chocolate syrup.
Thank you causing me to grow on a daily basis because I am at a total loss as to what I am doing most of the time.
Thank you for causing me to go to the Lord and say, Help, I need Vicatin…just kidding!